Advanced Guide for G-Spot Explorers – From Almost There to Oh My Gawd

Congratulations! You’ve found the moan-inducing and oh-so-elusive G-spot. Some women quite literally spend their entire lives in search of a genuine G-climax, and all that reaching and stretching and curving your toy at juuuust the right angle has finally paid off. So now what do you do to stimulate the G-spot (besides coming like a Queen)?

*This article on G-Spot stimulation is a follow up to Where is my G-Spot? Read All About It.

Your inner G is more than a one-trick pony. Now that you know where to hit the spot, we’ll show you how. We’ve cooked up all sorts of little tricks, tips and toys to stimulate the G-spot with and without a partner. On your mark, get set, ecstasy!

Set the mood

You’ve read all the sex articles, done your due masturbatory diligence, and now it’s finally time to reap the orgasmic rewards in style. As you might have learned during all those pleasure sessions, your G-spot works best when primed for penetration. Foreplay is fantastic, but there’s so much more you can do to stimulate your sexiest organ – wait for it – the brain (What did you think we were going to say? *wink*).

Tip #1: Create a romantic scene

The next time you’re ready to get down, go all-out and turn your bedroom (or wherever your imagination takes you) into a sensual pleasure palace. (You might need to make a run to Bed Bath & Beyond. Don’t worry, we’ll be waiting when you get back.) Picture one of those classic romantic sex scenes from a movie: a room dimly lit by candles, black or red sheets tousled on the bed, tons of cozy pillows strewn about, and see-thru drapery outlining the room. If you’re not up for a ton of interior decorating, just grab some colorful scented candles, a few tea lights to line your dresser and nightstand, and some musky incense sticks. Light up those candles, turn off the lights and boom! Instant sex ambiance!

Tip #2: Start with gentle caresses

Now that your humble abode is sex-ified, it’s time to get to the good stuff. Oh yeah, we’re talking yummy foreplay, baby! Whether you’re flying solo or coupled up, your G-spot needs a slippery slide for an orgasmic splashdown. Work all your best angles outside your body to get the juices flowing inside. Touch your breasts; brush your hands over your nipples; tease your clit with some tapping and rubbing. Some of us love gentle caressing and kisses all over our bodies; others like to get a big ruffed up – or maybe you’re down for both. Find what kind of foreplay works for you and rock it!

Tip #3: Use only hands and fingers

If you’re going for G-explosions of the solo variety, some of your best tools and toys are already attached to your body. If you’re used to warming up or climaxing with a vibrator, using only your hands and fingers is a fun switch, and it even teaches your body to orgasm more easily from multiple kinds of stimulation. Start by putting a finger or two inside your vagina and experimenting with different kinds of pressure and stimulation to the G-spot. Try curving your finger to meet your front vaginal wall or tapping and swirling a finger pad or two around the G-spot. Keep changing it up until you find a mind-melting technique that is just begging to finish you off.

Tip #4: Ride’em

If you’ve got a partner, you can ride them into the sunset with awesome positions to stimulate the G-spot. Whether your partner has a penis or wears a strap-on dildo, take advantage of that upward curve in their skin or silicone member, which targets the G-spot’s location about 3 inches into your vagina, right where your front wall feels round and puffy.

Tip #5: Go Doggy

Doggy style is an old favorite that’s also an A-plus move for direct G-spot stimulation. When you’re getting’ it from the back, your partner’s phallus or fingers are poised to slide right up against your secret spot as they move back and forth. Try angling your body in different ways to hit your G by starting on all fours and then lowering your chest all the way to the bed while arching your back and pushing your pelvis toward your partner’s movements.

Tip #6: Experiment with angles

If you’re more of a control freak, climb on top and use your legs and arms to change the depth and angle of penetration. There’s a lot more to the on-top position that you’d think! You can face your partner for tender kisses or straddle them backwards for a gorgeous view of that booty. You can also place your hands on the bed and lean forward or backward to stimulate all the walls of the vagina.

For an incredible blended orgasm – which combines both clitoral and G-spot sensations – hump your babe from the front, but instead of the usual up-and-down, grind your clitoris against their pelvis. Their member will still move around inside of you, but in a backward-and-forward motion that stimulates the G-spot intensely and creates some yummy sensations for your A-spot.

Whatever route you take, just remember there’s no right or wrong way to climax.  Enjoy the fun of discovering your body.  Because after all, the journey is the reward.

 

Advanced Guide for G-Spot Explorers – From Almost There to Oh My Gawd originally appeared on Rumble & Buzz

An Inside Look at the Home Party Business in a Pandemic

Since the beginning of the pandemic, independent home party companies have tried to determine how they were going to continue their businesses. Some manufacturers were concerned about the survival of our sector because we actually go into people’s homes.

Necessity is the mother of invention and the independent home party sector knew that in order to survive we had to evolve, which led us to explore the idea of conducting virtual pleasure parties.

There’s no question that the introduction of the Zoom platform made transitioning to virtual parties easier. Everyone in the industry is using it for everything from company meetings to product training sessions and even trade shows. Zoom is easily acquired and accessed, which helps to streamline the process. Although the virtual platform is readily available, conducting the virtual party itself brought a whole new set of challenges that did not exist in a live, face-to-face party.

Here are a few challenges we face when converting from in-home, face-to-face parties to virtual on-screen parties. We have to change our set-up process to best communicate with our guests. There are several things we need to take into consideration, such as camera placement, lighting, sound, answering questions, showing product, purchasing, time management and finally, preparation.

Camera placement and good sound is extremely important so the viewer can clearly see the functionality and design of the products and the presenter. Also, make sure there is sufficient lighting for the viewer. It can be hard to see both the presenter and the product if it is too dark. Investing in a ring light can ensure proper illumination for a better outcome. Also, having a space that does not have echoing background sounds and investing in a good microphone would be helpful.

Most party plan owners are a one-person show or may not have a helper present when it comes to answering live inquiries during the presentation. This can cause the interruption of flow by having to read the questions from chat. To streamline the process, hiring a helper — either live or on the virtual platform — would make the process more efficient and effective.

In a live party, we pre-select items for showing and demonstrating. Those products can be changed on a dime depending on the flow of the guests’ conversations about sex and toy usage. A virtual party does not allow for that flexibility. The presenter is only showing and demonstrating products that are pre-selected. In addition, it is more effective for the presenter to assign numbers to each pre-selected item. This will streamline the purchases.

The onus is on the presenter/party plan owner to create a purchasing system that works well for them. Keep in mind that the process is completely different from the purchasing process at a live party. In a live party, guests are taken in a private area to complete their purchases; whereas in a virtual party, it is hard to develop a discreet and confidential space to have them place their order. In a virtual situation, a private chatroom could be used to place an order; or if using Facebook Live, the guest could be directed to FB messenger to place orders. These are just a couple of suggestions. Time management is very important when preparing and conducting an in-home pleasure party. It starts from packing a demonstration kit to closing out from the last order. It takes time to determine what order to show items and how they will be discussed. Fielding questions is also included in the time management process. When conducting a virtual party, the same things are included, however, the prep time may be shorter, but knowing what will be shown and having an idea of what may be asked by the guests takes time and patience. The preparation of both setups is crucial for a great virtual party.

The preparation process includes selecting the right mix of products to appeal to a majority of the viewers. It is imperative that the presenter be very familiar with the functionality of each product prior to the virtual party. Make sure that the items are fully charged, loaded with fresh batteries, everything is easily accessed and ready to work. There is not much difference in preparing for an in-home party or a virtual party when it comes to prep.

The pleasure products industry, as a whole, is resilient and ever-evolving. The independent home party sector has always taken its cues from the industry at large and modified the rules to make them work for their customers. The independent home party owner is resourceful and creative in developing our parties to fit the current situation. We will continue to shape-shift as the market requires, where there’s a will there’s always a way.

An Inside Look at the Home Party Business in a Pandemic by Tamara Payton Bell & Kim Varner originally appeared in XBIZ

Vulva Anatomy 101

Getting to know the general terrain of an area you wish to explore is important to decrease the anxiety experienced by unfamiliarity. Here’s our complete guide on vulva anatomy.

Where is the vulva? Learn everything about the female anatomy and genitalia in our vulva anatomy guide.

This thought also holds true for sexual anatomy, and it is especially pertinent to females since their genital region is hidden, unlike the male genitalia which is up front and easily accessible. It is time to begin this exciting journey and become familiar with the vulva terrain, where you will be delighted to explore its pleasure-filled landmarks.

Anatomy of the vulva

Vulva is a rather underused word and is often mistakenly substituted with the word vagina. The vulva is the external portion of the female genitals. While the opening to the vagina is part of the vulva, the vagina is a separate entity all its own.The vulva is the home of the pubic mound, or mons veneris, clitoris, urethral meatus, inner and outer labia (technically called the labia minora and labia majora) and vaginal opening. This area is rich in nerve endings which, when stimulated, are responsible for sexual pleasure.

Mons Veneris

The journey starts with the mons veneris (“hill” of the Roman goddess of love). This is the area that grows the bush of pubic hair (believed to produce pheromones for sexual attraction) and provides a protective layer of fat over the pubic bone. When caressed, this area can deliver arousing sensations to the woman.

Clitoris

Travel down the road and the next landmark is the clitoris. This incredible landmark has between 8000-9000 nerve endings, and its only purpose is pleasure! Incidentally, clitoral stimulation is responsible for over 75% of female orgasms.

Anatomy of the clitoris

Clitoral Clura

The clitoris does not consist of only the pearl seen at the surface, but its crura extends under the vulva’s exterior and supplies pleasure-filled nerve endings to the entire vulva region. These nerve pathways are similar, yet uniquely positioned in each woman and the reason why what feels magical for one woman may not offer the same experience for another woman.

Urethral Meatus

The urethral meatus lies below the clitoris and is the opening from which urine exits the body. It is surrounded by a layer of erectile tissue called the urethral sponge. When this area is sexually stimulated, it becomes engorged with blood and can offer exciting sensations for many women.

Here's the urethral meatus diagram - important one to learn about the vulva anatomy.

The vaginal opening originates in the vulva and ends at the cervix (lower portion of the uterus). It is not a tube, but rather a potential space made of skin folds that can expand to accommodate either the head of a penis or the head of a baby. It has been mistaken for the area in which women experience the most pleasure during sex, but in fact, less than 25% of women experience orgasm by penetration alone. Although resulting in fewer orgasms, vaginal stimulation can still supply immense pleasure. Typically, the greatest sensations are experienced in the first third of the vagina where the nerves from the clitoral crura and the G-Spot reside.

Vulva anatomy: A diagram showing the approximate location of the G-Spot.

Labia

Originating at the base of the mons veneris, the labia surround the clitoris, urethra meatus, and vaginal opening. The inner labia, especially, are highly diverse, ranging from small and uniform to long and pendulous. The clitoral crura extends around this area, offering yet more areas of sexual pleasure.

Vulva Appearance

It is important to remember that each vulva will appear as different as the noses on our faces; the size, shape, color, and hair of each terrain is unique. This diversity is normal!

A woman in the bathroom with a mirror at her crotch, learning about the female anatomy.

and why the A woman laid down with a mirror at her crotch, understanding why her vulva can vary in size, shape, color, and hair.

Now it is time to look at your amazing vulva, and see just how beautiful it is! The two top ways to see your vulva are 1) leg up on a counter and 2) reclining with legs spread. Additional lighting and a mirror (or use your cell phone, but be careful not to accidentally send the pic!) will allow for the best view. Take the time to explore the colors, textures, and sensations, and become familiar with this amazing area which will provide you with exquisite pleasure.

 

Vulva Anatomy 101 originally appeared on Rumble & Buzz

Remote-Control Toys: Past, Present and Future

 

Technologically speaking, the sex toys of 2020 are bringing more to the table than ever before. It seems every time we turn around there is a new cool feature available. With all these bells, whistles and enhancements, some features stand apart from all the others because they literally change the way we engage with, experience and enjoy the toy. One of the biggest game-changers in recent sex toy history is the remote control.

Remote-control toys have changed the face of solo and partnered play and introduced the world to entirely new ways to engage sexually. Today we’re going to take a look how these once-low-tech toys have advanced to become the fun, erotic connection tools they are today.

What’s so great about remote-control toys?

We’re talking about vibrators that are equipped with a remote control and operated without having to come in contact with the toy itself. One may opt to use a remote-control toy during solo play because it offers the ability to change settings without interrupting playtime, especially when the product is difficult to grab hold of or is located in an orifice that’s just out of reach.

What really puts remote-control toys on the map is their ability to let partners control each other’s toys. This is where it gets fun!

The evolution of the remote-control toys

The earliest remote-control toys were corded with a wire running from the controller to the vibrator. As technology evolved, newer remote-control toys brought us separate, battery-powered remote controls without wires, which allowed another partner to easily toggle through speeds and functions. Now, remote controllers are rechargeable with many even equipped with a vibrating motor, making the remote a toy unto itself.

How remote-control toys can up your sex game

1 – So easy to use! Let’s be honest, there are some toys that — love them though we may — get complicated to control during use. Remote controls allow users to place their toy and then control it without having to reach down or fiddle around for it. This has been a game changer for anal toys but also allows for a hand-free experience with toys or a mess-free, uninterrupted intercourse experience with a strapless strap-on.

2 – Take them to the limit! Uncorded remote-control toys transformed couples play by creating the opportunity for one partner to control the other’s stimulation. For many this has allowed for some super-sexy power dynamic play where the partner “in charge” controls the remote and their partner’s pleasure experience. Uncorded remote-control toys let users tease, tantalize, and even torment their partner.

3 – Stay connected! As remote-control toys have evolved, so has the capability to control them from further and further distances. These days there are toys that allow users to control a toy from across the room, or, in the case of app-based controls, across the country allowing for long-distance play.

4 – Keep it discreet! Want to discreetly play in public? Remote controls can make it happen! Panty vibes and butt plugs alike allow users to engage in inconspicuous play time anywhere — both solo or with a partner!

Put the right remote in your customers’ hands

With all of these fantastic options, how do you help your customers find exactly what they are looking for? The answer is to ask a few key questions to help them zero in on the remote-operated pleasure product that best fits their needs and budget:

1- What type of toy? Clitoral vibe, anal plug, vibrator, prostate stimulator, or something else? There’s more than one way to enjoy remote pleasure!

2- How do they want to use it? Are they using it on their own or do they have a partner? If with a partner, will they be right next to each other? Or playing from across the room – or across the country? And don’t forget to remind them of all the fun playing-in-public products that are out there!

3 – How should it be powered? This mostly depends on budget! Corded remote-control products tend to be lower-priced so be sure to ask about price ranges. Battery-operated wireless remotes are the next level up and, if shoppers can afford them, rechargeable wireless remotes with a wide usage range will give them the most versatility of them all.

Remote controls have changed the sex toy game and with a little knowledge and patience you can help your shoppers use them to change their own personal sex game!

 

Remote-Control Toys: Past, Present and Future by Rebecca Weinberg originally appeared on XBIZ

The Top 10 Benefits of Using Sex Toys With Your Partner

You’ve shook hands with your boo and decided to work it out by sweating it out. But how do you ace the O and burst through the stress you’ve just had? Grab a toy and let it do the work for you! In this Pleasure Report, Tracy shares the 10 benefits of using sex toys with your partner, and also the best positions when you add a toy to the plate.

I always go by a motto when it comes to being in relationships: What’s good for me is good for us, or what isn’t good for me isn’t good for us. This motto is totally a great one to use when it comes to bringing sex toys into the bedroom with your partner.

Using sex toys doesn’t mean that you’re replacing your loved one’s body part for the other. It simply means you’re adding a little (or a lot) of toppings to your favorite ice cream from time to time. Yum. So, what’s good for us? Read on!

Top 10 Benefits of Using Sex Toys With Your Partner

1 -Finding toys to excite your partner can be thrilling! When you find the one that takes you and them to a different level is a plus.

2 – Sex toys can increase your libido.

3 – Using sex toys on your partner allows you to focus on pleasing them rather than allowing your ego to focus on yourself.

4 – Just like lingerie or erotic games, sex toys are another avenue to raise good vibes in your body from head to toe.

5 – Does your tongue get tired trying to bring the clitoris to its final “O”? Applying a vibrating toy can give your mouth a rest or the option to kiss or suck on another body part.

6 – Vibration, in general, travels from body to body. So, whether you, your partner or both of you are wearing or holding a vibrating toy, the vibration will be felt when bodies are connecting.

7 – Up for a quickie? A sex toy can speed up the time to a faster orgasm while on the go.

8 – Sex toys are perfect for warming up the body during foreplay.

9 – Use that vibe as a massager to release muscle tension in minutes.

10 – Sex toys will forever be PPA friendly — Portable, Powerful & Adaptable!

Before You Begin – Set the Mood!

Though some pros are excellent in jumping right into a desire sex position, most of us prefer setting the mood to be the catalyst of any positional play. So, here’s a great tip to keep in mind: We have 5 senses- smelling, hearing, tasting, touching, and seeing. Focus on at least 2 of the senses to stimulate your partner before getting into your positions. Stare into their beautiful eyes. Whisper sexy, sultry or dirty words into their ear. Use flavored lube to lick and suck on their most sensitive spots. Massage their butts. Light that scented massage candle for aroma. And have fun.

Best Sex Positions to Use With Sex Toys

  1. Standing
  2. Side-lying/ spooning
  3. Doggystyle
  4. Woman on top
  5. Dual-action — partner fingering while a vibrator stimulates the clitoris
  6. Dual-action — self-stimulation using a wedge while giving oral to your partner

———–

The Top 10 Benefits of Using Sex Toys With Your Partner by By Tracy Felder originally appeared on Rumble & Buzz

13 Ways to Switch Up Your Masturbation Routine

masturbation-routine-le-wand-01

 

Is your masturbation routine stuck in a rut? You’re gonna want to read this!

While studies have found that the majority of people do masturbate, sometimes we tend to get stuck in the same old routine. While nothing is wrong with having a masturbation routine, as human beings are creatures of habit, sometimes you need to spice things up. And, International Masturbation Month is the perfect time to take your masturbation game to new levels. Why? Because pleasure is a human right and you deserve to experience it in all its forms!

13 Ways to Switch Up Your Masturbation Routine

 

  1. Try a new position.

If you’re someone who tends to masturbate solely on your back or on your front, then flip. Masturbating on your back can feel really hot, as you lay there with your legs spread, but so can laying on your stomach, as you hump your way to orgasmic bliss.

Or, even better, get out of bed and try squatting or standing, or getting on all fours. There’s no right or wrong way to masturbate, and you might find that what you’ve become accustomed to isn’t exactly the best way for you—like, maybe you’ve actually been a legs-over-your-head masturbator this whole time, but you didn’t realize it until you gave it a try.

  1. Get to know your G-spot.

If you have a G-spot and have yet to locate it, stimulate it, or experience the pleasure it can bring to your masturbation routine, the time is now. Although most people with vulvas tend to rely on their clitoris for orgasms, once you start experimenting with your G-spot it can take things in a whole new direction.

Stimulating the G-spot can result in not just a vaginal orgasm, but can also lead to ejaculation. Yes! You can be one of those people who squirts! And, no, squirting is not urine. It may come from the urethra canal, as urine does, but it’s actually a clear liquid that can be released when the G-spot is stimulated for a certain amount of time. Granted, that “certain amount of time,” varies from body to body.

  1. Watch yourself in the mirror.

While this might conjure up that Broad City episode where Ilana props up a mirror above her so she can watch herself masturbate, there’s a reason why this is something worth trying: your genitals are awesome.

I once interviewed legendary sex educator, Betty Dodson, and this was a technique that she suggested because it really does give you a new perspective and watching your genitals respond to such stimulation is pretty hot.

  1. Explore edging.

Oh, edging! That’s exactly what you’ll be saying once you’ve given it a whirl and realized just how fantastic the impact it has on your orgasm. Edging is the practice of bringing yourself as close to orgasm as possible, then stopping. As in, a full STOP. Once the urge to climax has backed down, you do it again. And again. And as many times as you want.

Now, why would someone deny themselves over and over? Simple: it leads to stronger and, for some, even longer orgasms. Like any method of teasing, once you finally allow yourself to give in to pleasure, the experience is extra sweet.

  1. Use genital enhancing serums.

We’re lucky enough to live in a time when so options, in regards to pleasure, are at our pleasure. One such thing that will give your masturbation routine and orgasms an extra kick are genital enhancing serums.

Whilst there are many on the market, I prefer sticking to an organic, body-friendly CBD product. Should you live in a state where marijuana is legal, you can also get your hands on their THC arousal lube. Both are great for those who struggle to orgasm because it puts your genitals at ease, relaxing them, and making climax easier to reach.

  1. Watch porn.

If you’re a visual person, as in visual things tend to stimulate you more than fantasies alone, then try watching some porn. No matter your kink or fetish, there is porn out there for you.

If you’ve never watched porn, but are intrigued as to how it can enhance your masturbation routine, ethical pornographer, Erika Lust and her XConfessions series is definitely something to look in to. Again, Lust has something for everyone and has, most recently, released a new erotic film, “Sex and Love in the Time of Quarantine,” which is more than fitting at the moment.

  1. Try mutual masturbation.

Whether you live with your partner or have been sexting someone who just met on an app, awaiting the day that you can meet IRL, mutual masturbation is a great way to discover not just your body, but the body of the person with whom you’re enjoying it with.

In person, you can practice mutual masturbation side-by-side or by watching each other stimulate your own bodies. If the person you want to mutually masturbate with isn’t physically accessible at the moment, as this sheltering-in-place is still in effect, then Zoom or FaceTime work too. Throw in some dirty talk while you each get yourselves off, and you have a recipe for not just another form of intimacy, but another way to make masturbating even more exciting. 

  1. Use more than one toy a time.

In a world with so many sex toys to choose from, why would you masturbate with just one? If you’re someone who enjoys clitoral stimulation, as well as anal stimulation at the same time, combining a clitoral vibe with a vibrating butt plug, will have you singing Hallelujah in no time! 

  1. Read erotica.

If you’re not a visual type of person and prefer worlds to get you there, so to speak, then reading erotica while you masturbate is a perfect way to enhance your masturbation routine.

Although finding the right erotica might be a trial and error process, similar to porn, there’s something for everyone. Authors like Colette, the Marquis de Sade, and Anaïs Nin are classic erotica writers, but if you’re looking for more current writers, Elena Ferrante and Sierra Simone, among others, also have some pretty hot words out on the market.

  1. Seduce yourself.

Although some moments call for getting in and getting out when it comes to masturbation, it doesn’t always have to be that way. Instead, seduce yourself by putting on your favorite arousing songs, lighting some candles, and donning something that makes you feel sexy. You can make an evening of it. Especially this International Masturbation Month since we’re all stuck at home—you might as well take your time.

  1. Treat yourself to a new sex toy.

When was the last time you bought yourself a new sex toy? If you have to pause, look up, and think, then it’s been too long and you need to spice up your masturbation routine!

The best part about International Masturbation Month is that sex toy retailers will be celebrating too and are likely to have sales (cough, Le Wand, cough!) on selected items. So buy yourself that toy you’ve been eye-spying for months and put it to use. Variation is the spice of life and, frankly, you more than deserve a new toy this year.

  1. Use lube.

If you’ve never heard the term, “wetter is better,” then it’s time to get that thinking into your head. Whether you opt for a dildo to penetrate either your or your partner’s vagina or anus (prostate play, anyone?!) or prefer sticking to external toys that stimulate the vulva and clitoris, lube can make masturbation far more delectable.

The slippery smoothness of a water-based lube is exactly what your masturbation routine needs. Just be wary when purchasing lubes, as silicone-based ones don’t go well with silicone toys.

  1. Aim for other types of orgasms.

Fun fact: there’s more than one type of orgasm out there.

There are U-spot, G-spot, and A-spot orgasms among others! There are also people who can experience nipple orgasms and skin orgasms. And, of course, there are coveted multiple orgasms and blended orgasms. The latter involves experiencing an orgasm with both G-spot and clitoral stimulation at once.

Although it might seem, at first, that these might be difficult to achieve- practice, exploration, patience, and believing in yourself can get you there. The Little Engine That Could didn’t get over that mountain without a lot of determination and patience. But if she could do it, so can you!

 

When you realize there are so many other ways to experience pleasure, it not only takes your physical pleasure to new heights but opens your mind too.


 

13 Ways to Switch Up Your Masturbation Routine By Amanda Chatel originally appeared on Rumble & Buzz

 

 

 

 

 

Understanding the Anatomy of a Strapless Strap-On

strapless

In recent years the popularity of strap-on sex has soared and what was once a practice presumed reserved for lesbian couples has become commonplace enough to turn up in mainstream magazines! With this popularity comes an influx of shoppers new to strap-on play and, consequently, it is now more important than ever that adult retailers stock a wide variety of accessories and assure that staff know how to help customers find gear that’s right for them.

The swell in strap-on popularity has also resulted in manufacturers offering so many more strap-on styles, which, while exciting, can also be challenging for retailers and consumers alike. Strap-ons are available in two distinct styles: harness strap-ons, which, perhaps obviously, require a harness and strapless strap-ons that don’t. Today we will be discussing the latter. Strapless strap-ons can be a lot of fun to wear and use but they come with some very special considerations all their own, so let’s talk about it!

What are strapless strap-ons?

A strapless strap-on is a dildo that is designed to be used without the aid of straps or a harness holding it in place. Most have a bulb-shaped insertable end that the wearer grasps with their vaginal muscles. This style can be enjoyable because it allows for maximum physical closeness while potentially providing the wearer with G-spot stimulation.

What are the strapless strap-on options?

There are so many! Like most other toys, strapless strap-ons come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. Some feature fairly straightforward designs and other strapless strap-ons feature a textured pad for clitoral stimulation plus vibration — whether from a removable bullet or a built-in motor — that can be felt on both ends of the toy.

Helping customers find the right strapless strap-on for them

When working with shoppers to select a strapless strap-on, there are several points you should keep in mind and teach your customers. Strapless strap-ons can be tricky to maneuver. With this in mind, they may not be the best choice for first-timers and if someone chooses one for their first strap-on, they should leave your store knowing that it may require some time and practice to use it comfortably so they are not disappointed when they get home. Additionally, keep in mind that some folks who find strapless strap-ons difficult to use choose to use them with a harness. Many harnesses can be fashioned to accommodate this type of product. Let your customers know that, despite their name, strapless strap-ons aren’t always best-used strapless.

Finding the right strap-on harness isn’t always easy and selling them requires a twofold approach. Because there are so many variables that go into finding the right gear, it’s imperative to stock a wide variety of styles, sizes and types. You must have enough inventory to account for variations in body size/type, genital accessibility, comfort and sensations desired. Also, make sure your sales staff is well-educated on the pros and cons of each type of strapless strap-on. This way, they can manage customers’ expectations and set up solutions for possible pitfalls discovered after they use their new toy. Arming your customers with the information they need to use a strapless strap-on in a manner that is safe, satisfying, accessible and fun will attract lifelong customers and clinch repeat sales.


Understanding the Anatomy of a Strapless Strap-On by Rebecca Weinberg originally appeared in XBIZ

How to Ask for What You Want in Bed (Without Feeling Awkward)

how-to-ask-for-what-you-want-in-bed-01

Ever found yourself wanting more in bed? Sex educator Cassandra Corrado shares 6 proven strategies.

You’re lying in bed next to someone and they roll over to ask you how it was. “It was great” you lie, maybe giving them a kiss to make it seem more real. In reality, your rendezvous fell flat of your expectations.

Here’s the thing: If you don’t communicate your sexual wants to your partner (and you’re lying about what is fulfilling) then they can’t be expectations. They’re just wishes.

We’re rarely taught how to ask for what we want in bed. In movies, sex happens spontaneously — two people who are so turned on by each other’s presence, they have firework-inducing orgasms without ever telling each other what they want. In porn, you usually hop right into the scene without seeing the conversation that happened ahead of time. In sex ed, you were probably taught how to use a condom and how to “just say no”, but you probably weren’t taught how to have a real conversation about sex.

So it makes sense that a lot of us are pretty bad at asking for what we want in the sack.

Advocating for yourself is something that takes practice, whether it’s asking for a raise at work or teaching your partner how to help you reach an orgasm. You might know exactly what you want, but if you haven’t practiced asking for it before, then you’re probably not getting it.

So, here are six strategies that can help you ask for what you want in bed (without wanting to crawl under the covers and hide there forever).

  1. Do a confidence audit

You might not feel confident talking about your desires in the bedroom, but that doesn’t mean you’re an unconfident person. You might have high levels of professional confidence (you kick ass at work and know it), high levels of self-confidence (you’re pretty cool with who you are as a person and you know what your strengths and weaknesses are), or maybe you have high levels of relationship confidence (you know how to advocate for yourself in a variety of relationship types).

So, do a confidence audit. Think about the realms of your life where you feel truly confident. What helps you feel that way? Is it your skill level, your support system, the feedback you’ve received, or something else entirely? Take note — that’s the context that helps you exist in a confident mindset. Now apply that same analysis to areas of your life where you feel unconfident. Why don’t you feel confident? Do you have a helpful support system? Do you get regular feedback? Do you have a history of trauma that’s related to this area?

Doing a confidence audit is basically like doing a SWOT analysis on yourself — it helps you understand where you’re strong, where you can improve, and what your opportunities for growth are. Plus, knowing the things that help feed your confidence in one realm can help you nurture your confidence in another — like talking about what you want in bed.

  1. Talk about sex with your friends

Sex talk isn’t just for your sexual partners. If you’re having a hard time talking to your partner about your sex life, your friends have probably experienced something similar. Even if they haven’t, participating in more open, casual conversations about sex and sexual pleasure can be a lower-risk way (emotionally) of talking about what you’re into.

It’s like a practice ground for a more intense, private conversation with your partner. Just make sure you figure out how much you’re comfortable sharing — especially with that one especially judgmental friend in the group.

If you don’t have friends who you feel like you can talk about sex with, skim your mental inventory and see if there’s anyone who you could. Maybe it’s your doctor or therapist, or maybe it’s your mom. The key is to create a space where you can talk about sex in a normalizing environment, rather than a stigmatizing one.

  1. Start out of the bedroom

If you’re someone who doesn’t feel confident voicing your desires in the bedroom, then start with something basic: changing the setting. Talking about sex in the moment is important, but if you’re talking big picture desires, boundaries, and curiosities, it’s better to have that conversation with your clothes on.

Stripping down often makes us feel more vulnerable, and when we’re feeling vulnerable, we’re less likely to listen closely, advocate for our desires, and respond the way that we want to. Plus, talking about desire in the moment can lead to someone saying “yes” to something that they’re actually uncertain about because they feel pressure to respond right then.

So, take the conversation out of the bedroom. Make a cup of tea or pour a glass of wine and plan a “sex talk” date with your partner(s). Make it cozy and sensual — you’re designing the space to feel safe and open, just like the conversation itself.

  1. Take a sex survey

Use a quiz or yes/no/maybe lists to create a playful atmosphere. Online tools like MojoUpgrade and We Should Try It have surveys where you can mark your sexual interests as yes, no, or maybe, and your partner can do the same. You do the quizzes separately and receive an email sharing the results of only the things you matched positively on.


How to Ask for What You Want in Bed (Without Feeling Awkward) by Cassandra Corrado originally appeared on Rumble & Buz

“A” is for August…and Anal Pleasure Month!

AnalAugust-Main

“A” is for anal. “B” is for ball gag. “C” is for clit. “D” is for dildo…

I could go on and on – trust me, I’m all about the adult alphabet stew – but for today, we’re just going to focus on A because “A” is for anal and guess what? August is Anal Pleasure Month! (Insert sound makers, confetti and fireworks here, LOL.)

Why would anyone want to celebrate anal sex for an entire month, you may ask? Well, why wouldn’t we?!? With everything that’s going on in the world today, I think it’s important now, more than ever, to celebrate pleasure in all of its forms. And anal…oh, sweet anal…can be insanely pleasurable for ALL people, particularly if you can get out of your head and into your body.

Just like anything else in the sexual rolodex, there are going to be some naysayers – some folks who just can’t understand why anyone, particularly those who identify as heterosexual, would want to do “that.” And listen, I get it. There was a time in my life when I couldn’t fathom anal play, but then…I saw the light! Allow me to break down some mental barriers for those of you who are anal-curious but haven’t quite ventured “there” yet out of either fear or misinformation.

Barrier 1: Anal sex is just for gay men.

Let’s break this barrier – it’s simply not true. Anal sex is for literally anyone who is interested in it and has a butt. Sorry to be so blunt, but it’s true! Vulva owners can enjoy anal, hetero men can enjoy anal (hello P-spot pegging), lesbian couples can enjoy anal, pansexuals can enjoy anal, transgender people can enjoy anal, non-binary folks can enjoy anal – the list doesn’t stop there either. This is 2020, people – can we just acknowledge the fact that everyone is entitled to enjoy anal sex if they want to?

Barrier 2: Anal sex means full penetration.

We have to smash this mental barrier! Anal sex can be anything that involves pleasuring the anus in a sexual encounter. For instance, gentle touching around the anus before a well-lubed pinky insertion is anal sex! Rimming is anal sex. Butt plugs are anal sex. Anal beads are anal sex! When you expand your definition of what anal sex is beyond just full-on penetration, it starts to make the act much less intimidating for newbies.

Barrier 3: Anal sex is dirty.

Well, I suppose it can be – but one would hope that you and/or your partner would intuitively clean up a bit before anal sex, as well as after. Also, if this is really the biggest mental hurdle you’re facing, use condoms to cover your parts, a sex toy, or your finger(s).

Barrier 4: My partner won’t be into it.

This is usually an assumption people make because they haven’t worked up the courage to actually ask their partner if anal sex is something that interests them. Rather than assuming anything, why don’t you just go ahead and talk about it? Is it fear of judgement? Fear of rejection? If you don’t know how to bring it up, try using blogs or articles like this one as a jumping point. “I was just reading this article about anal pleasure – apparently a lot of people like it. Have you ever thought about trying it?”

Barrier 5: Anal pleasure is for couples only.

Oh hell no! Get that one out of your head, please, because the truth is that anal pleasure can be super-hot during a solo sesh. PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: Anal sex isn’t just for couples! You can do it solo! For penis-havers and vulva-owners, try adding a vibrating anal probe or small butt plug to your usual masturbation routine. Many find that the thrill of having anal stimulation, as well as clitoral or penis stimulation, is a huge turn-on and leads to some amazing finishes!

Barrier 6: Anal sex hurts.

Anal sex with insertion only hurts if you rush into it, take it too far/too fast, or decide to skip the lube. The anus is not self-lubricating like the vagina is, so be sure to use plenty of lubricant when you attempt any penetrative anal sex act, whether it be with body parts or toys. You want insertion to be super slick in order to find comfort and pleasure. Also, you never want to rush anal sex. Start SUPER slow, perhaps starting with just one knuckle of a finger, before moving deeper or adding any movement. The receiver should remember to relax and be communicative with their partner at all times. “Slow down, give me a little more, I’m ready, or stop” are all valid directions to give! If you communicate well the entire time, bliss is yours to receive. And remember – full penetration does not have to be your goal.

Lastly, I do realize that anal pleasure – even after coming to grips with the above – is still not for everyone. But don’t knock it until you try it. If you try it and it’s still not your jam, no problem! That’s what’s so fun about sex – exploring various acts to find what pleasures you and what doesn’t. It’s all a process…just enjoy the ride. Happy Anal August, all!


“A” is for August…and Anal Pleasure Month! By Jesse Hart originally appeared on CalExotic.com

How to Talk About A^al

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Once you’ve decided that you want to try anal play, you need to figure out how to tell your partner. If they’ve already said that they’re into it, that conversation will probably be pretty easy. But sometimes, anal talk can work better with a little planning.

Don’t Make Anal A Surprise

The most important thing to remember is to never surprise someone with anal play. While many people love anal sex and would enjoy adding it to their sexual repertoire, not everyone does. Some people have never tried it. Some people have tried it and it didn’t work out. Some people have tried it and had discomfort or pain. Some people have had partners pressure them into it. And unfortunately, some people have experienced sexual trauma with anal play. If you just go for it without talking first, there’s a possibility that the entire experience will be a train wreck.

The best time to bring up the topic is when you aren’t having sex. If your partner isn’t into anal play, for any reason, that talk will be a lot easier when there isn’t a lot of erotic energy going on. One good way to lead up to the conversation is to say something like:

* I’m sort of curious about anal sex and I’ve been reading about it online. Is that something that you’d be interested in exploring?

* I enjoy anal play and I’m wondering if you do too?

* If you’re into it, I’d enjoy trying anal play with you.

* I’ve been fantasizing about anal sex and I would really like to experience that with you.

These are more neutral ways to introduce the topic without creating pressure.

Pleasurable anal play is all about helping the receiver relax. You can start by talking about it in a low-stakes way.


How to Talk About Anal originally appeared on Anal Play 101 presented by b-Vibe