For almost twenty-five years, Ari Suss has headed one of the most recognized fetish and BDSM companies in the business. Such success has involved no less than a total abandonment of a career in finance to invest everything into a business of his own — the passion project that is Ari Suss’ brainchild, XR Brands.
Suss began ExtremeRestraints.com, a B2C ecommerce store, in 1999 at a time when web-based companies were increasing in popularity, and dungeon-based BDSM was thriving underground. Operating out of a one-room office and with what’s now considered jurassic technology, XR began distributing a handful of niche and specialty brands hand-picked by its Founder.
ExtremeRestraints.com sold items of interest to the kink community with descriptions written by people who had lived experience in kink. Suss, who personally has a passion for fetish, prioritized the genuine applicability of his products. This was not a novelty brand, it was a servicer to the famishing fetish community.
The business was such an initial success that XR began shooting out branches of brands, like beginner BDSM and sex machines, as quickly as it could supply; thus began XR Brands.
According to Suss, the greatest initial challenge was to keep up with the success and to maintain the speedy growth. The team expanded, and so did the office. Today, XR includes 65 brands with thousands of SKUs and has a fully merchandised and marketed brand that caters to almost every product category.
Just as it was with the kinksters contracted to write product descriptions in the early 2000s, the knowledge from XR Brands’ staff today regarding the BDSM lifestyle preserves the company’s strong reputation as a kink supplier with products that sell both in experienced and inexperienced markets. From XRUniversity.com, a free kink and BDSM educational resource, to regular virtual product trainings and store visits, the XR team has prioritized education in kink supply, while continuing to offer a strong series of brands with softer items and accessories.
Thanks to an increase in knowledge and pop features over the years — you heard it here first, Ari Suss of XR Brands says that BDSM is officially mainstream!
SE: What is your professional background in adult retail?
SUSS: I founded XR, which is XR Brands’ parent company, in 1999 after working in finance, and I have been CEO for 24 years. The first website we had was a B2C ecommerce store called ExtremeRestraints.com, which we ran in a one-room office during the early days of online retail. It was our focus for many years as we sourced and sold hard-to-find and advanced BDSM gear to people around the world while eventually expanding to include softer items. We knew that presentation was going to be key, so we invested a lot in how they were displayed online using high-end photography and descriptions written by people who had lived experience and genuinely knew what they were writing about.
SE: What is your experience with BDSM?
SUSS: I have a passion for fetish and a strong eye for the kinds of products and gear that people with similar passions want and need. When I was building ExtremeRestraints.com, I traveled a lot – especially to BDSM trade shows – to learn about the industry side of kink and BDSM and develop my business plan.
SE: How did XR Brands begin? And how has it expanded?
SUSS: XR Brands has come a long way! We started with a handful of niche and specialty brands, which were fully merchandised in order to support retailers with sales and marketing built-in. They were so well-received that we quickly launched other brands with a specific market or category in mind, like beginner BDSM and sex machines. Now we have a fully merchandised and marketed brand that caters to almost every product category.
SE: How many brands and SKUs does XR have currently?
SUSS: We currently have 65 brands with 4,000 SKUs.
SE: What have been some challenges and accomplishments for XR over the years?
SUSS: Initially, our challenges and accomplishments revolved around finding ways to maintain our fast growth in ways that felt steady and strategic while streamlining processes so that every step of the way moved as efficiently as possible. For example, our second year in business, in 2000, we used to have hundreds of package pickups each day at our first office and eventually our neighbors complained about the traffic, so we had to find an official warehouse that could accommodate our expansion. A good problem to have, albeit a stressful one!
The biggest accomplishment that I celebrate is building and maintaining a motivated and passionate team that helps me structure and fine-tune our marketing and development strategies, and execute the overall vision for XR Brands. We know we have to keep innovating and fighting to stay on top in this competitive market, and our team members have unique skillsets that allow us to boldly move in new directions and keep up with trends and changes.
SE: What is XR University and how does it relate to the mission of XR Brands?
SUSS: We introduced XRUniversity.com in 2012 as a free kink and BDSM educational resource, and it has grown to provide tutorials and workshops – still free of charge! – that help viewers develop their skills, discover new tools and learn all the unique ways to enjoy BDSM play. Each video is co-hosted by world-famous adult performer Aiden Starr and our resident BDSM expert Ian Rath and invites a different adult star to discuss the topic and demonstrate the skills with them. There are more than 100 episodes now that feature some one-of-a-kind conversations and educational content that is sexy and engaging to watch.
SE: XR Brands was nominated for SE’s 2023 Overall Pleasure Product Company of the Year Award. What does this sort of recognition mean to you? How do you manage to satisfy the BDSM market, which is hungry for transgression, year-after-year?
SUSS: We are honored to continue receiving these kinds of recognitions and awards, because it tells us we are accomplishing our goal to provide well-thought-out brands with competitive prices that sell well and give retailers what they and their customers want. While our specialty may be kink and BDSM, XR Brands has successfully maintained a consistent and strong series of brands that offer more “vanilla” and softer items. This has allowed us to diversify and stay nimble.
XR Brands maintains such a strong reputation in the BDSM and fetish market in part because so much of our staff truly understands the lifestyle and knows how to consistently develop market, and sell products that sell – and how to help retailers do the same. That combined with regular virtual product trainings and store visits from our beloved sales representatives has helped XR Brands stay connected with our customers and provide them with the information and support they need.
SE: XR Brands has a reputation for pushing the boundaries of the established fetish retail world. But were there ever any experimental products which appeared unsuccessful in the market?
SUSS: XR Brands comes up with many innovative products each year, and to do so requires a level of out-of-the-box thinking and creativity that often results in a winner right out the gate but also sometimes results in a slower mover. Thankfully, more than 95% of our products are re-ordered.
One of the innovative items we created and hoped would be a big hit is our 10X Bunny Slide rabbit vibrator, which we developed from scratch with new technology. It features sliding rings on the shaft that offer an additional level of internal stimulation that has never been marketed before. Our marketing team did a good job and created a video showing its best features, yet sales were slow to take off. We are still hopeful that when we show it to customers, they will give it a try. Currently we are offering a 50% discount for an extra incentive for retailers to give it a try.
SE: Are there areas in BDSM/fetish which XR Brands won’t touch?
SUSS: XR Brands is known for catering to categories that most other manufacturers won’t touch because of the difficulty of development, cost of production and the smaller niche market that can make profitability challenging. For example, our award-winning Master Series brand offers large-sized furniture, dungeon equipment and other gear designed to enhance the experience.
XR has its limits, of course, and we stay away from high-risk categories like CBD, poppers and products that are not in line with our vision.
SE: What is XR currently focusing on in retail and what’s to come?
SUSS: We are very excited about our recently launched Bedroom Bliss line that features sex position aids and cushions made from durable firm foam. This line took a long time to develop and involved a sizable investment. The challenge was finding the right quality materials to make sure we have the best sexual positioning products on the market that could be priced competitively. And I truly believe we accomplished that!
SE: XR Brands started out selling vanilla adult toys, but upon launching the Master Series line, a smash hit, the company shifted its main focus towards BDSM. However, you continue to offer a comprehensive product line that reaches most adult toy users. How do you feel about the perceived line in the pleasure product world between vanilla and kink? Between hard and soft? Or does this line still exist today?
SUSS: We feel this line is being blurred more every year. It’s not the first time it has happened, of course. Anal play was once taboo and even considered kinky, but now it’s a core part of our industry’s manufacturing. Whether a product is “vanilla,” “soft” or “kinky” really depends on the person and their experience, perspective, comfort and beliefs than what it’s made for.
There will likely always be a line, however fine it may be, when it comes to displaying and marketing BDSM products vs. softer products. But as we’ve seen from the last five+ years of mainstream media, kink and BDSM is no longer something pathologized or reserved for dungeons and has become a regular part of many people’s lives – even people who might consider themselves vanilla!
SE: Do you think BDSM is becoming mainstream?
SUSS: Oh it’s already mainstream! Discussions of kink and BDSM play really broke into the mainstream following Fifty Shades of Grey and consistently remained a part of pop culture. But visible representation of kinky gear has always been seen in music and fashion. Rihanna’s hit song S&M had a music video filled with latex and leather, gags and whips, rope and restraints – almost too many kink accessories to count. And it came out a year before Fifty Shades!
Especially over the last 5 years, we have seen celebrities photographed carrying sex benches, wearing collars and harnesses and incorporating BDSM into their red carpet looks. We have also seen docuseries treating kink and BDSM as regular parts of couples’ sex lives without the taboo or stigma that, years earlier, would have been imposed on it. Netflix’s “How to Build a Sex Room” featured everyday couples creating next-level spaces in their homes that included dungeon furniture, whips and floggers and restraint systems alongside “vanilla” sex toys and accessories. We are honored to have our products featured in some of these shows and events.
This kind of representation has given the public a sense of permission to explore, experiment and get curious about kink and BDSM and we love to see it.