Orbiting Venus, polishing the banister, downstairs DJing, shaking hands with the milkman… there are countless euphemisms for masturbation, and with it, countless misconceptions about it. The jokes that surround jerking off, unfortunately, go hand-in-hand with the same surrounding it; shame that has been taught to us by institutions and cultural taboos that overlook the countless benefits “taking the self-guided tour” has to offer.
Believe it or not, masturbation doesn’t just feel good — but the benefits are vast! Not only can it be beneficial for your overall health, but it can even help you to become a better sexual partner, and to help you enjoy sex better overall.
Masturbation Myths and Facts
We’ve rounded up some of the most unbelievable masturbation myths to be wary of, as well as facts that you can rest assuredly believe in.
Masturbation Fact: It’s Good for You
Besides the physical pleasure of being sexually stimulated, our favorite masturbation fact is it can have several positive health effects. Masturbation can help reduce stress and release tension. After a solo session, you’ll be in a state of relaxation that can help you to enjoy better sleep. Solo sexploration can boost your mood and concentration, alleviate pain, and more.
If you have trouble reaching orgasm with a partner — however, alone, you’re the orgasm queen — then perhaps you should take a more mindful approach to get the most out of this important benefit of solo play. Masturbation is all about you getting in touch with yourself — both physically and mentally. If you have a partner that gets jealous of your self-pleasuring sessions then feel free to let them know that it has nothing to do with a lack of interest in them.
This is a time to bond with oneself, relieve stress, and focus on your pleasure. With this knowledge, you can educate your partner on the type of stimulation that you enjoy and hopefully, those pointers will lead to shared orgasms.
Masturbation Myth: It Means There’s Something Wrong With Your Relationship
One of the biggest myths and misconceptions is that it means a person is having problems with finding and/or pleasing a sex partner. However, masturbation could actually help improve your sex life with a partner. When you know how you like to be touched and can communicate that to your partner, then you’ll soon be enjoying better sexual experiences together.
Masturbation can even be done in the presence of your partner — include your partner as you show him how you satisfy yourself and explore mutual masturbation together to take your sex life to new heights.
Masturbation Fact: It Can Help with Stress Relief
Perhaps one of the most important benefits is its ability to help people ease their stress. An orgasm can sometimes be just what the doctor ordered after a long day in the office. Masturbation helps to release endorphins and boost serotonin to get you feeling revitalized and satisfied.
Masturbation Myth: It Can Cause Physical Problems
One of the most long-running myths is the long list of physical problems that are supposedly its side effects. Masturbation cannot cause any harmful physical side effects like growing hair on your palms or blindness. Some myths also claim that it can cause impotence or cause a penis to curve – this is of course not true.
According to a 2010 study by the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, 67 to 94 percent of men have masturbated at least once in their life, and 43-67 percent indicated they had masturbated within the last month. Women reported that they masturbated less — between 43 and 85 percent indicated they had masturbated at least once in their life, while 21 and 43 percent had done so within the last month. Based on these statistics, the pleasure gap doesn’t only exist during partnered sex. With more self-pleasure, we can all enjoy the vast benefits of this intimate activity.
Masturbation Fact: It’ll Help Vagina-havers Orgasm Quickly
According to Psychology Today, women report that they experience orgasms in as little as two minutes from masturbating, compared with 45 minutes with a partner. When you know exactly how you like to be stimulated, then the orgasms happen a lot quicker. This fact is one of our favorites too, because who doesn’t like to be efficient? And being able to instantly satisfy your erotic cravings is almost like having a superpower.
If you’ve yet to figure out what makes you explode with pleasure, then one of the ultimate benefits of masturbation is the lessons it will teach you about what you like. The more that you spend time getting to know your body, the easier it’ll become to pinpoint exactly where you like to be touched and how. Another one of the benefits of masturbation is that you’ll train yourself to last longer — which will come in handy during sexual experiences with a partner.
Mutual Masturbation and How to Take it to the Next Level
Masturbation feels good and being with a partner is so much better. Why? Because these mutual sessions mean being fondled by your partner. The unexpected rhythm and pressure of mutual masturbation are added elements of surprise and intimacy which ultimately lead to better lovemaking sessions.
Releasing sexual tension is an obvious reason for mutual masturbation, but it is also a stress reliever that can be a great way to fulfill fantasies with your partner, learn about each other, or be sexual without penetration. One of the best reasons to engage in mutual masturbation is to introduce sex toys. Whether across the room or borders, toys undoubtedly take center stage.
Getting Ready
To prepare your body for mutual masturbation, take a shower, lather well, and trim your nails. For anal exploration, the process is more involved. Start with emptying your bowels an hour or two beforehand. Taking a hot bath can relax your muscles (and your nerves) while making sure your anus is clean.
Finally, prepare your mind. Allow your eyes to linger over your partner and vice versa. Mutual masturbation can be incredibly intimate, and chances are that you are both feeling vulnerable. Get comfortable by finding positions that give you access to the places you want to touch.
Start By Touching Yourself
Begin by caressing erogenous zones, leading to your genitalia. If your partner can’t see you, be descriptive in what you are doing. Take it to the next level with a toy, like the Glas 8” Sweetheart Glass Dildo. Regardless of your genitalia, this hypoallergenic glass dildo can be cooled or heated for sensory play. It works as an insertable and has a smooth heart shape for rubbing or tapping.
Touch Your Partner
The perfect play for learning what your partner likes! Listen to their feedback. Learning how to gauge their response and getting to know their body, as well as your own, are the rewards of mutual masturbation. Even explore each other simultaneously with double-ended dildos.
Frottage
Frottage is rubbing genitalia against parts of each other’s bodies. Using lube, glide across the parts that give you the most pleasure. You stimulate one or both partners’ genitalia this way.
Anal Masturbation
“Up your butt and around the corner” was once a well-played childhood response used as a taunt. But, now that we’re adults, it sounds more like extremely accurate directions to achieving pleasure through anal. We all know what anal masturbation is, and maybe we’ve even tried with a partner or as foreplay. However, taking a deep dive into solo butt stuff is a little more involved.
Everybody Has a Butt
Anal masturbation is the act of pleasuring oneself via the anus. But so many people don’t know this is an option, or worse, they know about it and won’t try “because it’s the butt”. The thing is, everybody has a butt, and there are pleasures to be enjoyed by all. Of course, there are different ways to go about this rear-end revelry depending on how your body is made. With a little digging, you can find your way to booty bliss.
How to Clean for Anal
First things first, start with a clean anus. Empty your bowels, and then take a shower or bath to relax your muscles and clean your clincher. You might also want to use a douche for full flushing. Next, you’re going to want to take care of your nails. Trim them short, cutting any excess cuticle tissue. Buff down any edges. The tissue around and in your anus is quite thin and sensitive. You want to make sure your hands and nails won’t aggravate or tear your skin due to rough texture.
Ring the Doorbell
Using an absolutely absurd amount of lube (and by absurd, we mean whatever you were thinking, triple it), begin by using a finger to go around the outside edges of your anus, slowly. Doing this allows you to relax why paying attention to small changes in pressure and other sensations. You can tap at the entrance (think of ringing a doorbell) and slowly work your way up to insertion. Go at your own pace. This isn’t just in reference to speed. Your own pace includes how deep you want to go and how many fingers you want to try.
For Prostate Owners
Remember those different bodies we discussed earlier? Let’s talk about it. The way bodies with a prostate experience this is much different from those without. The main reason is the prostate itself. This walnut-sized gland is referred to as the P-Spot and is capable of delivering mind-blowing orgasms that differ drastically from a penile orgasm. A P-Spot orgasm tends to last longer, be more intense, incorporates the whole body, and doesn’t necessarily produce an ejaculation. Find this spot by going in about 1-2 inches and applying pressure downward.
For Uterus Owners
Bodies with a uterus have quite a different experience because there’s no prostate gland to stroke. That said, more elusive than the G-Spot is the A-Spot. Word has it that the A-Spot is easier to access from the back. That may or may not be accurate, but it’s fun to investigate. Apply strong pressure to the front wall of your rectum and go in a few inches to hit the spot. One thing to keep in mind is that once you go back, you can’t go front. The natural bacteria in the anus is a sworn enemy of the vagina’s bacteria and pH balance and can cause all kinds of problems. If you want to go back and forth, remember to wash your hands or use/remove barrier protection between each transition.
Be Selective
We get it. It feels unexpectedly good, but that doesn’t mean it’s okay to shove anything that fits into your bunghole. In general, don’t use anything that isn’t a tongue, a finger, or a sex toy specifically made for anal. Seriously, you can wind up in the ER. We have all heard the stories, and none of us wants to be the one telling them. No fruit – it can have too rough a texture, break off with no way of getting it out, or have worms. No candles, no lightbulbs, no mobile phones. Don’t do it.
What Things Are Safe to Insert in the Butt
Instead, try sex toys that are specifically made for solo anal masturbation.
The great thing about anal masturbation is that it’s uncharted territory for a lot of people and there are so many things to try. From cleaning up with an anal douche, to cranking things up a notch with a toy, you’ll always have a way to keep things fresh and interesting as you go down the rabbit hole of solo anal play.
According to a 2010 study by the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, 67 to 94 percent of men have masturbated at least once in their life, and 43-67 percent indicated they had masturbated within the last month. Women reported that they masturbated less — between 43 and 85 percent indicated they had masturbated at least once in their life, while 21 and 43 percent had done so within the last month. Based on these statistics, the pleasure gap doesn’t only exist during partnered sex. With more self-pleasure, we can all enjoy the vast benefits of masturbation.
Reasons to Masturbate More – Benefits of Masturbation originally appeared on Guide to Glass Dildos.